Fly anywhere over any part of the roof I wanted and wouldn’t have to lug assorted heavy ladders all over the place. It wouldn’t matter whether the roof was slick steel or a fragile tile----I could hover anywhere I needed to. Forget the “smart car”----I will just fly to the inspection----you know what Seattle traffic can be like! I could probably eliminate most of the tools in my tool belt----and I could stop looking like I am armed for, “Beyond Thunder Dome.” I could use my cape as a drop cloth when I go in the attic. I could see Carpenter ants in walls. I could see Termites in beams. I could see Anobiid Beetles for the first time in my life. I could see what is growing behind the wallpaper. I could actually see if the roots of that giant tree that is 6” away from the foundation is a problem or not. I could report on the condition of the “insides” of pipes and ductwork in the home----just as well as the outside of the pipes----a tremendous ability when it comes to 100 year old perimeter drains! I would no longer have to fantasize about (or covet) infra-red cameras. I would be able to see where insulation is missing. I would be able to see whether there is moisture behind the tiles and be able to see what the heck kind of substrate the tile is on. I would know that the heat register under the couch is all smashed like a pumpkin, that the floor under the washing machine has bulldozer track marks-----and the wall behind it isn’t much better. I would be able to see that the furnace heat exchanger is cracked----and so is the foundation behind the newly remodeled basement walls. I would be able to see that there is asbestos siding under the vinyl siding. I would be able to count the actual number of rats hiding in the insulation in the attic or crawl space instead of just guessing that there “might” be an infestation. Oil tank present? No problem for Superman. Where is the septic tank? No problem for Superman. My terminal quest of the “perfect” flashlight would be over----and I wouldn’t have to worry about old Darth either. I could even see things that NO ONE should ever have to see. Of course there would be certain “disadvantages” to being Superman: I would have to be real careful not to rip decks off of houses. I would probably end up owning a lot of handrails and towel bars and mini-blinds. And, I would probably destroy a lot of painted shut windows. But about TIME: we all know how FAST I would be able to do all of these things. So----how come when I answered the phone the other day the client asked if Superman was there? 
Of course this would mean that I could drive a “smart car” to my inspections instead of my current “dumb car.”
Charles Buell
Click on the Rose 
to check out: AHA!---A Forum of Landmark Proportions---your Group
PS, for those of you that are new to my blog (or for some other "unexplained" reason have never noticed)
all pictures and smiley-face inserts (emoticons) (when I use them) have messages that show up when you point at them with your cursor.
DeCroe, is my "etherial" home inspector assistant and occasionally flies into my blog and other people's blogs to offer assistance. To find out more about her beginnings just click on Raven.
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Click on the Rose to check out: AHA!---A Forum of Landmark Proportions---your Group
PS, for those of you that are new to my blog (or for some other "unexplained" reason have never noticed)all pictures and smiley-face inserts (emoticons) (when I use them) have messages that show up when you point at them with your cursor.
My WORDLESS WEDNESDAY pictures and some selected POEMS & STORIES.
C'mon Charles, admit it. Isn't it really all about Lois ? Lois Lane ? Was she the one calling ? Have a terrific Memorial Day !
Hi Charles: great post --> I simply loved reading it.
:)
Bill, it is DEFINATELY about Lois----Superman wouldn't be much without Lois:)
Thanks Matt.
Charles, I think it was Nutsy disguising his voice like Lois that got you all excited about doing a superman job. LOL
~ Life is Good
What? You can't do all those things? I thought that's why we hired home inspectors... 'Never knew the person we really needed was Superman.
Entertaining and informative - how'd you do that?
Charles - I have had clients in the past who apparently thought that Superman would be showing up to perform the inspection, based on the fact that he "should have known" some of the stuff that was inside walls, etc.
Instead of Superman I have too many days that I feel like the Lone Ranger and Tonto is on vacation.
Roy, Nutsy could NEVER sound as good as Lois.
Margaret----you mean I am not usually entertaining and informative?:)
Jason, yup---kind of the incentive for the post----too often it is assumed we can see like Superman.
Joe---or even Don Quixote
There is one home inspector in our area who has a device to check for moisture in the walls
Have a great Memorial Day Weekend.
Good Luck to you in 2009.
Karina
Love it! I am sure others can add to it.
Charles...
This is a wonderfully entertaining post. Very creative, and a well-deserved feature! I liked the "disadvantages" the best!
Roland---most likely a moisture meter?
Karina thanks----no inspections this weekend for a change:)
Billie, I would love to hear some additions.
Richard, thanks---it was too much fun to put together. I agree about the disadvantages.
Mr Charles,
Been there, done that. Eat your heart out. Don't you wish you had paid me for the work I did.
Nutsy
Is that "S" for Sushisquirrel?
Hey Charles, Super writing even if you are not REALLY superman!
what do you mean if you "were" Superman. we all know that Charles Buell, is really Superman's alter-ego, and secret identity.
Very entertaining post.
FYI- I get calls for Lois Lane, so when are you going to fly down here and see and do my inspections Charles? Superman?
Beverly thanks so much.
Alan---how is this?
Marc, thanks
Tammy----just send me the airfare:)
Ok, so this is a tongue in cheek post, right..... BUT why was this featured???
I am stumped...is it because it is just a cute humorous post??
OK...I can give ya that...it IS a cute humorous post.....
AR is really strange these days..... don't consumers follow and
read these featured posts?
I don't see the draw for consumers...maybe the entertainment value, hmm?
Jay Leno, step aside....
OOops...He IS!!
Hehehe!!
;-)
Charles... thanks for the read and my first good laugh of the day! Have a great weekend.
René
Far as I can tell features are not purely for consumer content. Members Only posts can be featured too. AR is just looking for posts that they want to be more widely read.
Alexander, I think AR has a sense of humor is all:)
Rene---you are welcome----glad I could get you laughing.
Steve, I think you are right there.
Great post Charles! What did you say when you answered the phone and they asked for Superman?
Mary
LOL, great one Charles ! Am expecting great things from your future inspections AND blog posts : )
LOL This blog was super. No pun intended lol. I like the way you broke it down.
Charles, in reality I had this thought as a seven year old boy. It lasted only as long as I jumped out of a tree. I soon learned I did not have flying power. But give me credit, I tested it.
LOL, I love this!
Mary----no Superman here----is this Lois?:)
Christopher and Stephanie---thanks---I do my best:)
Winston, thanks for the Super comment:)
Gary, you seem to still be flying high to me:) We all want to fly don't we? Bird envy----must be some psylogical term for it.
Jessica, you flew in there when I wasn't looking:)
Charles,
Did you borrow BB's superman costume? He wore one last week & was featured too. Hmmm. Perhaps I could have it for next week. Seems to lead to gold stars.
Sincerely,
The Bionic Woman
Very cute -- I have a feeling the listing agents may not like the results! Have a great memorial day weekend.
Bionic Woman Irene, what can I say---everyone loves Superman:)
Joan----I think you are probably right about that.
Loved it! It's a holiday weekend for goodness sake.....lighten up folks!! You are a superman and a very funny writer.
Enjoy the weekend flying around!
The only problem I can see Charles is that everyone would expect you to be CHEAP because you woud be so FAST so you'd have to do 30 or 40 inspections in a day and I can't think of any Superman powers that will get your reports typed up any quicker! LOL
Anna, thanks----think I will go have a banana now:)
Sarah---but I have Lois to do that!
Sssshhhhhh! Stop kidding around. People hire you BECAUSE YOU CAN do all those things.
But Charles, EVERYBODY loves Superman (well almost... he does have his enemies). Why not just show up in your superman outfit and cape for a home inspection and see how it goes. Agents couldn't get upset with you, sellers couldn't get upset with you, and neither could buyers... after all nobody gets upset with Superman! If they did, you could just zap them on fire with your eyes!
Charles, I was just about to ask Steve to get your meds to you quickly when I saw that star! A feature! Congratulations.
Dawn----Oh yea---I forgot
Judi, but wouldn't I have to give everyone rides?
Barbara, thanks, and I know----I almost did have a heart attack!
Charles~ Very entertaining and made me laugh! The funny thing is our clients do sometimes think you can do all of these things.... I sometimes feel like they think I am Wonder Woman.....LOL!
Charles, Very entertaining post and congratulations on the star. Well desirved my friend...
Vickie, I so agree----agents could just as easily write their own version of this.
Michael, thanks----ripped any decks off lately?:)
Charles, this is a great post. I kept thinking how hard it must be to be you and NOT be Superman. Sort of like being me (just a REALTOR) without the crystal ball that folks seem to think I own. God bless you and try to fly below the radar.
The best perk of all...you could show up to inspections wearing a leotard and tights and no one would think anything of it!!! :o))))
Very cute post...I think it might be fun to be Superman, at least for a week or so :) Enjoy the weekend.
charles, be careful what you wish for, there would be lots liability to being superman, not many challenges either. be thanful for what you do have and who you are.
I love it!! Thank You for the giggles!! It reminded me of when I was a little girl! I always wanted to be Speed Racer!! Okay, I was a bit of a tomboy!! I could run faster than all the little boys my age!! I used to run around singing that theme song! Go Speed Racer Go go Speed Racer.......... Thank You! for sharing it!
Marian, yes I get confused myself:)
Jeani, now I have to wear clothes over them so that no one will know.
Carole, thanks----it is starting out good already.
Mark, you sure have got that right----but I could always beat up any one that wanted to bring up "liability" issues:)
Judy, Speed Racer would be cool.
Hi Charles. No problem. You are oready being hired to see things most of us can't see, so you are part way there!
Bob---no wonder people are confused:)
Hi Charles.
Very funny post!
I have to agree that it may have been Nutsy playing a prank on you. You know how squirrely he can be!
May I suggest sending Raven over to have a talk with him?
Time to add "any similarity to Superman or his powers is unintended and purely coincidental" to our home inspection disclosure. Funny post, Charles!
John I love it! Great idea:) Also, "don't be fooled by cheaper imitations."
I love Superman. I was so sad when he left us. Not too crazy about the second guy. I just watched Superman Returns and did not care for it.
Have a nice weekend.
I should have guessed Nutsy was the superman all along!!!! What? I'm sure he can spot nuts with his Xray vision. Not sure about the termites though...~Rita
This was funny, and right on point. Thanks for a great read, congrats on the feature (as if you needed that, with 19 and counting...) and enjoy the MD weekend....
Angela, Superman is as much a part of American folklore as apple pie.
Rita---squirrel power! (looks like the Sounders and Rapids tied tonight:)
William, thanks----I feel lucky to be featured:)
Hi Charles and so glad I stumbled across your post. You are a breath of fresh air as well as entertaining and I grew up w/Superman and was always a fan of his comic books -- yes, I'm an older citizen.
Sue
I trade all those powers for crystal ball any day. Imagine; Yes Mr. & Mrs. Home buyer your furnace will fail on December 20, 2011.
Charles, cute take on it. Congrat's on the feature, well deserved, unique.
Sue, thanks for your kind words----hope you keep coming back:)
James, very good----that would be helpful.
Missy, thanks
Hi Charles -- You post illustrates the true complexity and importance of hiring a very competent inspector, buyers beware and ensure you hire the best.
Chris, now if we could only figure out a way for them to do that:)
Funny post! Congrats on the feature. Since you are not Superman, disclosure would probably be the best way to go!
Melissa, thanks----and yes disclosure is where it is at for us mere mortals:)
Charlie - Maybe you are onto something. I can see you as a host on some HGTV real estate series dressed in a superman cape! - the Super Home Inspection show, following Flip This House.
Carol and of course I could "literally" flip the house:)
You wouldn't have to go inside - just leave a bill and fly home.
Jay, are you saying that I would no longer have to take my shoes off?
Superman wears really cool red boots. Which, since he is always flying, are clean of mud and debris!
Any of course if he comes to a muddy spot he can just hover above it to keep his nice read booties clean.