Have you always wanted to own your own business? Are you a self starter, with a lot of ambition and want to make tons of money? (Who doesn’t right?) Well, I am here to introduce you to a brand new business opportunity! COPSI Inc. will be selling franchises all over the country in the coming weeks. If you get in on the ground floor you will be able to capitalize and monopolize on this incredible business opportunity by buying a huge regional franchise that can then be broken up into little franchises----sort of like a little pyramid scheme---except with a real chance of actually making some serious $GREEN$----without turning green----without going green! (International opportunities available soon!) You can not beat this opportunity with a stick! As soon as you buy into this business opportunity (all major credit cards accepted) you will be given a “password” where you will be able to take an “intensive” 15 minute online course (eat your heart out Andy Warhol). You will learn everything to you need to know about this growing field to perform extensive OPS evaluations; and how to protect consumers from the very real dangers and health concerns associated with this problem. You will then be able---at no extra charge----to take a very short online test that will fully qualify you as a Certified OPS Inspector. After sucessfully completing the test you will receive (within 3 business days) a beautifully framed (behind real glass), “Certificate of Completion,” to proudly display on your home office wall. You will also receive a box (via Snail Mail) containing your free moisture meter adaptor and promotional materials that includes books of matches with your Business Name & Loco (The entire COPSI course is printed in miniature on the inside cover----always handy in case you forget anything). So act NOW----please go to www.cpi.comonwhoareyoukidding and sign up now. Hundreds of operators are going Nutsy waiting to take your call. You can be part of the problem----or you can be part of the solution. Remember there are millions of homeowners in need of this service. You just never know when someone is going to stink up the place----YOU can be there to prevent some innocent home buyer from purchasing what could very well turn into an onerous and odorous nightmare. So act now----become a Certified Offensive Perfume Smell Inspector now.
Home Inspectors----do you need another ancillary service in these difficult times? (NO additional tools required----merely a simple adaptor to the moisture meter you already have!)
Charles Buell
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Click on the Rose to check out: AHA!---A Forum of Landmark Proportions---your Group
PS, for those of you that are new to my blog (or for some other "unexplained" reason have never noticed)all pictures and smiley-face inserts (emoticons) (when I use them) have messages that show up when you point at them with your cursor.
My WORDLESS WEDNESDAY pictures and some selected POEMS & STORIES.
while I happen to love the smell of Channel No. 5 on a curvy lass, I can recognize (especially in an elevator) that sometimes the ladies can ... overdo it.
Charles,
What price do you think I should charge for this service? Always looking for ways to expand the business eventhough I will probably end up with a nausiating headache with this service!!!
I see this as a valued service on the commercial inspection side of the house, Shopping malls, grocery stores, restraunts, etc....
Charles, can you see if Texas is still available for that smelly franchise, I'm in. Can you also check New Mexico is available. LOL
~ LIfe is Good
Alan, some do for sure----some guys do as well----I heard Elvis did:)
Dan----we are "suggesting" that the expected cost of this service woud be around "a dollar three eithty seven." I do see your point about the commercial side.
Roy I will put a hold on those two areas pending the outcome of your test results and more importantly the credit card info:)
Hey Charles: You are one FUNNY guy! Wish you were in my market so you could do some instpection for my clients.
Tom----so does that mean you want in on a franchise in your area?:)
Mr Charles,
It is obvious to me that this will be a multi-million dollar franchise. I also see that, in the text of your advertising copy, you have commandeered my name so you can capitalize on my creditability and popular fan base. I believe that I am entitled to 50% of all royalties.
Nutsy
I heard Elvis did:)
gasp - you take that back!!?
People are a little slow here in Ohio, so I might be able to pick up the whole state. I'm guessing that the adapter is Universal and will fit my meter.
Too Funny.
Nutsy---just because I used the word Nutsy in my promotional materials only proves that someone can read to you----nothing more
Alan, but it is true isn't it?
Trust me Jack---if it fits mine it will fit anybody's:)
Thanks Tad
Charles, I think it would work here in Pa. I can market it as an after septic repairs and inspection. If Pa is still available sign me up.
Suesan, you realize this comes with a non-refundable money back guarantee right?:)
Charles, you have to be having a slow period! You're going to be writing comic books before long, fully illustrated. I'm with Nutsy; you used him so cut him in on the profit! This is a pretty darned funny blog!
Barbara, the State of Arkansas is not taken yet----you better hurry:)
Sounds like someone either did not have an inspection today or they had wa-a-a-ay too much time on their hands - LOL...
your building consultant for life in Nashville, TN
I seem to remember this recycled "nose meter" from a while back... did we go through our old blogs???
Michael, this post was one of those that looks like it might have taken a long time but it almost wrote itself once I got started:)
Kevin----you never know when you are going to need to pull out the old Noseometer (Pronouned: nozz-OM-ehtr)
"You can not beat this opportunity with a stick!" (Maybe somebody should have) :))
Hey Kevin---Ohio is still available:)
Charlie - My house would fail inspection for sure after my husband just bought a sweet smelling carpet dust that smells like perfume and supposedly vacuums out. But, it all it did was leave behind the sickening sweet scent of fake flowers.
Carol, he sounds like a perfect candidate for the New York region franchise:)
Somehow it doesn't surprise me that Nutsy would be behind this new business venture.
Jim, Nutsy seems to be able to get his behind everywhere it doesn't belong
Charlie, You may have been sniffing something when you wrote this. Have you been going into stinky crawlspaces?
James---I meant to email you----Connecticut is still available:)
First Nutsy's cousin Wheatloaf asks me to back his venture and now you Charlie. I think you been getting too close to those squirrels. They're begining to rub off on you.
And I thought it was that musk deodorant----and now you are telling me it is squirrel?
Charlie - where can I get me one of them there detectors? The url didn't come up...
Very kindly,
Croakster
Jay, are you saying you want to buy a franchise?
Croakster, Frog Deodorant? Another franchise idea? Talk to Jay.
Bwahahahahaha. What is so funny is that so many folks are pushing similar schemes in this economy only (gulp), they are serious.
Good one, Charles.
Margaret, yes----and they were the incentive for the creation of this post----there is way too much of it.